Mark trusted Lisa with his life and every other aspect. They had been married for eight years, and there had never been any problems of trust. They had created a life of love, support, and understanding together. They had struggled, they had achieved great things, and they had very few serious rows.
However, he had something troubling him for several months.
Lisa was new to her job and would mention a co-worker named Jake. Initially, Mark was not impressed. It was natural to find friends at work. In fact, he was very pleased Lisa appeared to be enjoying her new job.
But the more the weeks progressed, the more Jake's name was in everyone's mouth.
Today we went out to lunch together as Jake and I.
Jake assisted me with completing a project.
“This weekend, Jake's going to the company barbeque.”
In the beginning these comments were innocent. Slowly, however, Mark began to see how much Lisa and Jake enjoyed each other's company beyond the hours of office. They texted a lot, spoke on the phone at night, and sometimes socialized with other coworkers on the weekends.
The more he noticed it, the more uncomfortable he would feel.
Mark didn't like feeling that way. He had no reason to suspect that Lisa was not faithful. He did not want to be controlling, jealous, or insecure. But he simply was not able to block out the feeling of unease in the back of his mind.
He didn't let anyone know of his feelings for a whole few weeks.
One night after supper, when he sat beside her, he finally spoke out.
Lisa, I have something I want to tell you," he carefully said.
She raised her gaze and nodded.
"Of course."
Mark took a big breath.
I trust you a lot, and I'm not sure you're doing anything wrong, but lately, I've been feeling uncomfortable about how much time you're spending with Jake. I don't want to accuse you of anything; I just wanted to let you know how I'm feeling."
Lisa looked surprised.
She didn't say anything for a brief second. Then her face relaxed and she looked at him pleasantly.
Mark, I am not aware that you're feeling like this.
She said that Jake was recently experiencing emotional problems due to a difficult divorce. He didn't have a lot of close friends around him, and she had been trying to help him get through a difficult time in his life.
There was no romance between us, she told him, there's never been. But Jake's only a friend.
Mark listened carefully.
Her explanation wasn't enough to give him the peace of mind he was looking for, but what did was her attitude of listening to his worries without getting defensive or dismissive. Instead, she stretched out her arm and took his hand.
She softly said, "I'm glad you told me. I'd prefer to hear how you feel rather than you bottling it up inside. They went on talking all night.
They discussed and shared openly their ideas of boundaries, communication, and the need to make time for each other despite their packed programs. At the end of the night, Mark had an idea.
He asked, "What about spending more deliberate time together? Let's just get more date nights, less of a distraction out of the way, and more weekends together, you and me, just us.
Lisa smiled.
"I'd love that."
Throughout the next months, they lived up to their commitment. There were weekend adventures; they would cook together, watch movies, and check in with each other after a long day.
Gradually, the distance that Mark felt was lost. Surprisingly, the talk that he most dreaded hasn't destroyed their marriage. In retrospect, Mark felt that Jake wasn't really the issue after all.
What really scared him was losing his connection with his beloved person. He was more than ready to endorse the truth over quiet, and so they grew closer than they had in years.
In some cases, not feeling the discomfort is a sign of trust. It's about facing them head on, engaging in conversation, and collaborating to ensure that the love that matters most remains intact.
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